Fear. Fear has a place. Gavin de Becker’s book, The Gift of Fear was a marvelous read. That being said, I’m beginning to realize that fear and I need to develop a healthier relationship.
I had the distinct pleasure of being invited to attend a “Test Kitchen” ran by Kitchensurfing today. I’m sure I’m using incorrect terminology but the point is that I was invited to a food event. With actual chefs. Me, a person who 3 months ago was working in an office (on the hamster wheel and fantasizing about getting off) was in an arty, funky-chic Silver Lake home while four different chefs did their thing. I can’t even describe how emotionally overwhelmed I was. I mean, these kinds of things don’t happen to me! I only dream about this stuff. And the best part? I belonged. I didn’t just feel like I belonged – I did belong. I met some wonderfully amazing women (and men). I was soaking up the sun and eating great food. Making connections. Being a real LA mover and shaker. For once! And life was good until I got scared.
What if today was a fluke? What if this is my only foray into the culinary world? What kind of job will I really get? I mean, would any one ever really take a chance on me???? And then I realized what I was doing. And I’m ashamed for slipping back into old habits while simultaneously proud that I recognized it. I’m ok. I am remembering to breathe and appreciate the awesomeness that was today. Today was awesome – make me want to cry awesome. And not to sound braggy, but I had this awesome day because of me. Because I have brave moments. Because I realize how important it is to ‘speak my truth’ and ‘ask for what I want’. Yes, the cliches work. I have told just about everyone that I know how much I crave working in the culinary industry. And because of that, one of those awesome people invited me to come along today. (Thanks, Carrie Jablonow of Kitchensurfing!!!)
There is no need for fear. Not today. Today was great. I will have more days like today. I know I’ll have bad days but I didn’t today. Things are flowing at the right pace and I need to remember to enjoy it. Today was awesome. I was happy. The sun was shining. I learned a lot and met some wonderful people. I belonged.
Today’s awesome brought to you by :
Erin Weber FB: erinslunchbox
Kristin Guy FB:thecuisinerd; Twitter: @thecuisinerd
Katie Twitter: @zenutrition
Carrie Jablonow Twitter: @DiningDiary
S. Debra Evans FB: S.Debra Twitter: @eastladebra